Crazy life

Life can be so crazy sometimes you just need a space to be able to catch your breath, we have 3 out of 5 dogs sick and 2 new grand babies coming in the next few months.  One Momma just found out she has to move her business because her space mate is raising her rent, she tells her this 10 weeks before she is suppose to deliver and I think that just sucks big time.  How would she have felt if while treating her cancer my DIL had abandoned her and not taken care of the shop and her business.  I know I can say it’s just not fair but then we all know life is never fair.  Stress is not a good thing for this pg mom since she’s already pretty stressed and that’s not health for our new to be grandson.  The holidays just seem to make things harder for me since my Mom isn’t around anymore and she was Mrs. Christmas.  It’s just not the same holiday anymore and usually I wish I could just run off somewhere and hide until after Jan 1.  This is just a rant and life will go on, we have vet appts and doctor appts almost to the end of the year.  Medicare is no fun and the secondary ins is too expensive if you don’t go HMO which sucks buckets!  It’s not fun getting older and whoever said we grow old gracefully I would like nothing better than to smack up side the head.  Oh well we are all still above ground and that’s something we can be grateful for.  I hope everyone has a wonderful holiday season with no drama.

Vacation 2018

As always our vacation was spectacular and I only wished and looked at every for sale sign I saw, I so want to live up in Pacific Grove even tho I know that it’s practically impossible.  I’ve always wanted to settle near the ocean and as an adult life has just kept me from it.  I don’t swim in the ocean and I don’t sunbath anymore but I love the sounds and smells and in Pacific Grove you also have the magnificent trees which I have always loved.  We didn’t do much it was vacation but we went to the aquarium and the antique mall and the used book store.  We had a beautiful lunch and afternoon with my childhood friend and it was just wonderful seeing her after a whole year.  We grew up living next to each other and she saved me near the end of my first marriage and I just wish we lived closer so we could see each other more.  This was our 15th anniversary and 15th year of going up to Pacific Grove, we’ve spent 14 of those years at the same place and we love it, already made our reservations for next year.  Every year we get older I feel the pull stronger and stronger to move up north.  I’ve planned a little surprise for my husbands birthday this year since it will be his 70th, I made reservations for 4 nights at our little place so I can take him to dinner at our favorite restaurant and see the aquarium and go to the trees this time.  He wanted to go there but we didn’t make it, we had both been sick for a long time and walking wasn’t something we felt the need to do but come May things will be different, and we can go up to the trees and drive up the coast for the first time in years.  It gets us there much later but it’s a beautiful drive and now that the road has reopened after their terrible slide we want to see it.  I hope he’ll be surprised and I hope I can keep this secret for 6 most…

Life goes on and we get older and each time we go up north I don’t want to come back down here where the stress seems to just permeate from every corner of our world, up there he is really retired and it’s super nice.

What happened to September?

I don’t take to writing easily in fact it’s extremely hard for me but I keep trying.  It’s been a hectic month and another one that seem to pass through our lives at light speed!  The heat here has played a huge factor in what we get done.  My workouts ceased about a week ago when I woke up one morning and could barely move, something in my back went haywire.  I saw my chiro but still suffered for several more days over a weekend before I could see him again.  I finally feel like I might be heading in the right direction the pain is not as intense but still not gone.  I still can’t move very fast or in certain ways but that too shall come.  I want to get back on the treadmill and at least walk, I’m also going to attempt my pushups to see how that feels.  Yoga sadly won’t help me because I can’t bend well without pain.  It’s a slow process but all I aim for right now is getting it better before vacation.

Ahhhh thinking of vacation is my yearly joy, I can’t wait to get up north where we always go, Pacific Grove has got to be the most gorgeous place I’ve seen on the coast.  It still has that quaint feel and it’s so close to whatever you need to live, I so dream of living there.  Everything we have going on right now has lots to do with  us getting ready for that vacation, we have so many things to do to be ready and they keep getting pushed aside.  I must get Bill’s camera and lens to the shop so we can have it checked out.  I am planning a little tattoo as a surprise for our anniversary but still haven’t heard back from Tiffany yet.  Kim said she would take me and we’ll make a day of it.  I emailed Eli the one who did my rose to ask about it but I didn’t like his answers much and want to see Tiffany.  Weird I don’t really know Tiffany but she’s done lots of my work and I really trust her especially after my rose disaster!  Not happy seeing a doctor tomorrow regarding some weird white bump that came up in my tattoo, I asked the guy who did it he said I don’t like the look of that you should see a doctor?  Like why wouldn’t he know what or even be willing to look at it?  Anyway I’ll see Dr. Lee tomorrow and see if he says anything or refers me elsewhere.  Next week we have the car serviced and the dogs shots and the week after they get baths before we go.  I’m still working hard to drop weight before we go.

Life is so fast our Angel Face will be 3 in Dec which is like tomorrow, we’ve yet to conquer the overnight visit.  We really need to find a double mattress and box springs before the new baby comes.  I have a feeling we will be keeping her overnight while Mom and Dad take care of business.  Christmas is our new grand daughter from Bill’s daughter and Feb comes our new grandson.  It’s going to be very interesting for awhile with all the babies, it’s been years and years since I’ve been around multiple babies…

I need to call the computer guy out to fix everything but I had hoped to get a new phone before, I’d like to do that before vacation too.  There is a long list as life sails by at hyper speed but we’ll manage and get there we always do.

Stay well and share those smiles you never  know who needs one : )

Life can be baffling

As I sit here and look back on the last mo I see that I’m still having some difficulty getting it done.  I’ve been reading tons of material about mindfulness but still have not tried the meditation or yoga.  I was working out a little again and doing my tread but that too took a small vacation this week.  Monday I was fine, Tues I took a day off and Wed too then Thurs I did my pushups, weights and squats but no tread, I did no treadmill all week, will pick back up tomorrow.  I was experiencing lots of pain and muscle spasms so I took some time off but will get back on track tomorrow.  I’ve been eating my overnight oats since I have them but won’t be purchasing again, the sample package was great but it’s way to expensive to do as an everyday breakfast and I have seen dozens of recipes for the same thing and all I have to do is make it myself.  I’m sure there would be way less sugar and salt if I did it myself.

We got the good news that Tyler will take care of the animals again in Oct, I’m so relieved I know he loves them and takes very good care of them.  I do need to find a home for Bones tho he just can’t get along and I don’t want to be cleaning 2 cages.  We added snails to the tank again and so now I need to make the snail food like before but first in the next couple of weeks I must change all the water, filters and sand, it really smells bad and there’s not lots of sand left.

The cleaning and not yet painting has all come to a stop as well, I’m gonna see if I can’t light a fire again tomorrow as well.  This just must get done, we have so much painting left and then the outside needs doing and the pool needs redoing and we need carpet and new toilets and a vanity with a new sink in the bathroom.  I’m going to try and convince my hubby to take to outside off the backroom since it’s useless and leaks anyway, it’s stupid to close it up and lose so much yard with that pool out there.

Our little angel face is growing like a weed and it will be so fun watching her with a baby brother and new baby cousin.  She’s almost completely potty trained and seems to love the big girl panties.  I really want to get her some more.  Being a grandma was well worth waiting for.

Mother’s Day Surprise

This Mother’s Day I had the best time going out with my daughter, we went to the Camarillo Outlet which we’ve been to before and we always have a great time there.  While there she was like what should we do and I said let’s get matching tattoos….I told her what I thought about getting to represent us and to throw in a little reminder of my Mom.  Well she was actually receptive and thus began the search for the perfect tattoo choice for us, first it was going to be a couple of lavender sprigs with a daisy to represent Mom then we went round and round for months.  We finally decided on a rose for me a bud for her and a butterfly to represent Mom and her passing.  Aug 8th we finally did it, she kept stalling and when she wanted to just try a walk in I got nervous about the place. I wanted the full on consultation and talk to whoever was going to do this, I was doing it below my collar bone and she wanted it on her ankle but also choose my Mom’s writing to place on her wrist.  Everything turned out great and we had a super day doing this together, still healing and my first color but we did it.  From what I saw of hers it was just perfect and the writing looked as if the guy had channeled my Mom it was her writing for sure.

I’ve been reading lots about mindfulness and what it means to help calm your mind and be present which inevitably will bring down my blood pressure.  Doc wants to see me again in 3 mos so I have to keep talking the meds for now.  Eating cleaner and working out everyday now too.  So far I’ve had my Shakeology everyday for lunch since Reset too!  I must get on track we are having 2 more grandkids and the one we have is a real handful, need to exercise regular just to be able to keep up with my Angel Face.  Still haven’t started my yoga or a regimented program yet, just treadmill, squats, pushups and some weights.  I wanted to start something come Monday but I don’t know if I’m ready yet.  We shall see…..Peace Out!

Keep smiling it makes people wonder what you’ve been up to. ❤

Hot summer days

I know I’m not the only person to complain about the heat and how it feels like every year it just gets hotter, but so far this year has been a scorcher and it seems we have new fires every day.  I understand they say that climate change has loads to do with it but come on we now have a year round fire season and I don’t know about anyone else but the firemen and women need a break.  California can’t have anymore big fires there isn’t much left to burn anymore!

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again I’m not writer but I need to start trying more, I also have begun reading and studying mindfulness or meditation.  I need to start because the doctor suggested it for my high blood pressure which is mind-blowing because it’s always been on the low side.  I have to take a low dose med for a while and soon I’ll be starting my 21 day reset from Beachbody and hopefully cleaning up my diet will also help.  I don’t add salt to anything and we don’t eat much processed food but I have high blood pressure and the doctor and I agree it trump syndrome.  The news makes me so angry, just seeing what this maniac is doing is enough to drive anyone over the edge and that’s exactly what it seems to have done to me.  I don’t watch news like I use to but I still get my 2 shows at night and of course I see more than I want online.  So between the meds and diet and trying to meditate and learn to journal I will be able to bring it down.

I so wish we could move from So Cal for so many reasons but just getting outta here sounds good.  We can barely afford living here but where we want to live is even more costly than here.  Amazing what I saw in Ohio for incredibly lower prices and it’s still the same, real estate is low.  There are several states that the cost of living is less but in Ca we have access to so much and can get to the mountains, trees and beach so easy, not back there.  When I became a Beachbody coach I had big dreams but they didn’t come, the people I thought would get into BB and drink Shakeology didn’t and I could never get anyone to sign up as a coach under me.  I posted my workouts for years and my food and shakes and showed before and after but still nobody was interested in even trying to get healthier.  Kim tried for a bit but wouldn’t stick with the workouts she even signed as a coach for a while but then because she couldn’t get others she said it was too costly and gave up.  When she did that meant I lost a coach and I had signed up Bill but couldn’t see any reason to keep paying for that since I wasn’t getting anyone else.  If I picked up 3 coaches it would have covered all my fees and my shake but I couldn’t even get there.  I was wide-eyed and hopeful seeing the success so many others achieved becoming higher ranked coaches and making a real income.  All I had really hoped for was that people saw that I was getting healthier and in super shape and would want to do it too.  I thought I could help so many but it just didn’t happen.  I sent out more samples than I can count and even gave away a couple of bags to get people healthy but nothing.  I even brought someone in who then turned around and enrolled under another friend instead of with me, that hurt and was about the time I gave up.  I stopped drinking my shakes, stopped working out and gained weight and just didn’t even care anymore, now I’m paying for those 3 years of doing nothing or should I say not sticking with it like I was.  Sure I’ve started working out again several times but then I get sick and stop and still have not started again, now I blame the hot weather.  Always an excuse if you look hard enough, I’m the queen of excuses.  My doctor will keep me taking meds if I don’t get a handle on this and that’s why I started in the first place.  My cholesterol was thru the roof enter Shakeology and within a month it was low enough to stop the meds to lower it.  I don’t want to keep taking these meds for the blood pressure so I absolutely have no choice but to do what’s right, eat right and exercise and then maybe just maybe in 6 weeks I can stop the meds.  I actually allowed others to bring me down and out of the routine I had of exercising everyday and drinking my shake, I wasn’t drinking coffee and I wasn’t eating meat but I was feeling great and didn’t look to bad considering I hadn’t really exercised since high school.  I have pretty high hopes again but this time it’s just for me to get back to excellent health, if I can’t convince others to join me and lose weight and get healthier then that’s ok I’ll do it by myself, not like I haven’t before.  Bill is always supportive and he always worked out with me and even continued on for a long time after I stopped, I loved working out with him and loved lifting weights which is really good for us older ladies and osteoporosis.  So I will be reading more about meditating and trying to quiet my mind which seems like it’s always going and I will use the mindfulness journal.  I will do my 21 day reset and clean out this body and during that time I will do yoga and my treadmill, after I will start a harder workout.  While on reset we’re not suppose to work our muscles hard because then the toxins that I’m flushing out of my body will go into the muscle and that’s not good.  With any luck and much determination I will get this done just like when my cholesterol was up.  It’s not like I don’t know what to do and how to do it, not like I don’t know working out is better than not and that eating clean is better than not.  I am waiting for my reset to get here then once it does I will get this show on the road, in the meantime I’m reading and trying to figure out this mindfulness and meditation thing.

As my very good friend Laura says share your smile they are contagious and you just never know who may really need yours.  Later

 

Another rip roarin day!

Sometimes I totally feel like I’m being picked on, my computer has been losing internet connection on a regular basis, which is irritating as hell.  So do I call AT&T to give them shit or is it just my lousy computer being predictable again.  I really need to get this thing looked at and now my laptop is also giving me problems and obviously I don’t know how to fix the sucker!  

The depression I felt I was fighting seems to be hangin around like a long lost friend I still haven’t touched my quilts and now I’m lookin at more people living here and running out of time to get them done before we go on our little trip.  I just can’t seem to get my act together these days.  We started a new program and it’s a good hard one makes me feel I’ve worked out and worked out hard but I have pains in odd places and now I have a clicking in my knee.  From what I understand it’s the beginning of my old friend arthur itis.  I don’t have enough issues in my hands so lets hit the knees too!  I am going to buy the new Tai Cheng program I believe it will help with my issues and maybe even get my stress level under control.  It teaches meditation and has an alignment disc that is special for just us coaches.  Yep gonna order that tomorrow, start my tying get my laundry and house done and my hair!

More rants

I do not understand how my computer can tell me there is no internet connection when there are other computers using it and my ipod picks it up.  AT&T sucks so bad!!!!!  Wish there was another company out there that actually offered internet service and it was actually a good service.  I’ve been using the internet for many years now and not once have I had a provider that I would recommend to anyone!

I am going to have to breakdown and go to the apple store here one of these days, I have so many issues with my big computer and I even have issues with my laptop.  I just haven’t wanted to go down to the galleria to take care of this, and I don’t want anyone going with me and I doubt very highly that I can pull that one off.  He will have to carry my computer for me.  I should try to take care of this before our vacation but I haven’t even been able to get myself going into tying these quilts.  I do not know what is wrong with me these days, I workout hard and then I just end up sitting around pretty much all day long.  I hate it!  I’m thinking that I’m depressed and that’s why I feel so wounded right now!

Laundry is done again so I’m off to get the rugs out!

Why is technology trying to make me crazy!??

This morning I woke up to no internet connection which drove me right up the damn wall, I don’t know why I blow so hard over the electronics I own?  Most don’t function the way they should and I don’t know squat about dealing with the problems.  I really hate all the tech crap we have to deal with and it made me nuts that I couldn’t get on and log in my stuff.  Catch 22 if you ask me, I can’t live with it and can’t stand to be without!  Certifiable here just call the doctors and send em right over.  When I lose it my doggies get upset they’ve sadly seen me very mad so now they are scared when I start to get mad, which makes me even more angry….yes I have major anger issues and absolutely no clue how to resolve them.  I really don’t even feel like sitting here complaining because I know deep down it will do me no good what so ever so why bother and why do I get so pissed so easy?  Sometimes I wonder why I’m even here if it’s only to constantly feel crappy, depressed and mad!  I really need to get a handle on these things and fast.  It does me no good to be this way!

A Blog…Moi’

I can’t even believe I’m trying to do this, I’m no writer but then some of the stuff I see written are also by non writers.  Where do I start, well computers make me crazy, I can’t figure too many things out which makes me want to jerk this sucker out of the wall and throw it in the pool.  In other words they don’t make me very happy!  There are millions of things that I need to do and I can’t figure out how to do them and I have nowhere to turn for help.  Some people are very lucky and have their children who know more or a spouse who knows more or friends who are willing to help.  I have none of the above!  Oh I have children, they don’t know anymore than I do, but my grandchildren now they know it all!  My spouse won’t even turn on the computer and my friends well let’s just say the ones I do have aren’t near enough to help and the ones who are close aren’t friends!  It’s not like I’m stupid and I even took classes which taught me nothing.  So me and computers have a very nice love/hate relationship, most of the time I hate mine!